Dan Oig Guest post by my son, Dan Oig
Allow me to explain, because meditation is really the practice of letting go.
Whether the problem be financial struggles, relationship turmoil, or existential dread – meditation first allows us to distance ourselves from whatever issue is troubling us, and second, transmute the suffering into gratitude through a shift in our perspective.
Why do we suffer? Well, Buddhist thought says we suffer because we desire. We desire money, and when we don’t have it – we suffer. We desire belonging, and when we don’t have it – we feel lonely and we suffer. Most of all, we desire not to suffer, and thus – we suffer.
When we’re happy, for example, often times we can’t fully enjoy it – because some part of us knows that the happiness is fleeting. So we cling to the happiness. Happiness is a slippery fish. The tighter we grip it, the quicker it flies out of our grasp. And on the contrary, when we are suffering, we resist the suffering just as strongly as we grasp onto the slippery fish. It has the opposite effect. What you resist persists.
Something I’d like to point out that is very important to understand when discussing such topics: Suffering is part of the game of life. It is noble, and it is necessary. Without the contrast between suffering and elation, life would not be nearly as magical.
With this in mind, we can see a guideline to live by that will allow us to suffer less. And let’s be real, we all want to suffer less.
The guideline is this: let go. Let go. LET GO.
When you’re happy, let go. When you’re sad, let go. When money troubles come, let go. When money comes in, let go. When relationships end, let go. When relationships blossom, let go.
Meditation is letting go. Letting go of thoughts, sensations and emotions. It is the redundant practice of noticing, and letting go. Noticing once again, and letting go again. There comes another thought, emotion, sensations and there it goes. And we remain the silent observer.
One of the biggest misconceptions about meditation that stop people from moving deeper into their own practice is the idea they must stop themselves from thinking. Meditation isn’t forcing thoughts to cease. This is an impossible task and will only serve to drive you crazy and quickly give up with the ridiculous practice called meditation.
What we must do instead is watch our mind. That is all. Don’t judge, don’t react, don’t resist, don’t grasp. Just let go.
To make my point even more strongly, next time you try to meditate – don’t. Don’t even try to meditate at all. Just sit there. Just be. This will likely lead you closer to the true essence of meditation than any effort to meditate (as a beginner) would.
Once you understand that the harder you try to meditate, the harder it is to actually meditate, you will make leaps and bounds in your practice. You will start to understand that you are not your mind and your thoughts and your feelings. You are the pure consciousness that is observing these things.
So, if you want to suffer less and spend a little more time with the slippery fish – let go.
